Happy Valentine's Day!

*DISCLAIMER*  I'm well aware Valentine's Day is an antiquated tradition and is basically stupid.  However, I have to say I think it's nice to celebrate relationships and remind ourselves how lucky we are (or maybe how lame your relationship is, in which case it's a good wake up call).  When I was single, I would use it as an opportunity to get trashed with my single girlfriends, which was also nice.  So I guess if I'm being honest, I love Valentine's Day!  I love celebrating ANY holiday, especially when everything is pink and pretty and girly.  Although this year, we're so busy we decided not to make a big deal.  I did get a pretty good Valentine's card though:

It's cute, funny and kinda pervy, just like Aaron.  Of course, he didn't put it into the envelope and the glue stuck to the card.  Classic!

Other than that, we're not really going all out to celebrate.  We both had lunch dates with different friends and now we're in Vacaville as Aaron sells his truck.  Not the most romantic Valentine's we've ever had, but as long as we're together that's all that matters.   For the sake of perspective, last year, Aaron borrowed his brother's massage table and gave me a full body massage complete with my favorite sushi, champagne and Redbox movies...utterly magical!

This year we tried to mix business with pleasure.  First order of business, we sold Rowdy:

Aaron posted the listing on Craigslist around midnight and by 8am, we had 2 bites!  We picked one (super nice guy) and the deal was done by 4pm.  Farewell, Rowdy! We've had some good times and you will be missed!
Since we were in Vacaville to sell the car, we decided to hit the outlets.  Everywhere we went was so packed today, I couldn't believe it!  Everyone's really stepping up their game this year.  My dad bought me these awesome shoes:

These are officially my trip shoes and I'm in love with them!  They were on clearance for only $50!  If you're near Vacaville, check out the Nike outlet!!  I usually find great shoe deals (the clothes are not so cheap...bastards).
Then we went to Fenton's, the best ice cream place in existence:

This location is relatively new, the old location (and the one I usually go to) is in Oakland.  Their toasted almond ice cream is my all-time favorite, especially with their homemade chocolate syrup!  OMG!  Aaron absolutely loved their banana nut.  Their ice cream is a must!
Check out the romantic Valentine's sunset, for all you lovebirds:

Pretty in pink!
We then decided to go to Outback Steakhouse, since we had a gift card.  However, we didn't make a reservation (we were being romantically spontaneous) and that totally backfired because we ended up waiting an hour and a half!!!  Aaron finally went to the front desk and complained and it was then they realized that they accidentally erased our name off the list!  WTF?!  Your job isn't that hard, Outback hostess!  Get it together!  We were so happy to finally be seated, as we were starving by this point:

Guess who ordered what:

Yup, my dainty date ordered tilapia with lump crab meat and I ordered the ribs (which I then spilled all over my dress like a clumsy oaf...I was too weak from hunger!).  Delish!
Now we're finally home, about to snuggle in bed, as Aaron is leaving me tomorrow to visit little Jaycie in Twenty-Nine Palms.
I hope everyone had a super delightful Valentine's Day/Night!!

Summer Squash Pasta

Wassup folks?!  Today, we are making pasta, but instead of noodles we are using squash!

The recipe called for zucchini, but all I had was squash and I didn't feel like driving (It's a miracle I even got out of bed this morning).  Now, I typically don't like making recipes that aren't easy and accessible to all, but I had to make an exception with this one because I really wanted to try it.
Let's do this shiz!
This is the contraption I used:

It's my mom's curly fry maker from Sur la Table.  It's pretty awesome at making curly fries, so I figured why not curly squash noodles?  If you don't happen to have one of these strange contraptions, you can also use a mandoline or a spiralizer (no idea what that is).  If you have none of these (in other words, you probably have a life), then I guess you can try cutting the zucchini/squash really thin?  Or just watch me do it.
So I washed 2 squash (the plural of squash is squash, right?) and cut the ends off and stuck one end on the spikes of the curly fry maker:

Then I stuck the other end into this hole:

Then you turn this lever:

Watch the magic happen:

In the end, you're left with this weird squash mushroom:

After 2 squash, this is how many "noodles" I had:

It looks like a lot, but they're relatively thin and will cook down quite a bit.

Here are our ingredients:

We've got a crap-ton of garlic, red pepper flakes, chicken broth (if you have white wine, even better!), a lemon and 5-6 chicken breast tenders.

I took a large pan and added some olive oil (a tablespoon or so) and turned the heat to medium-low:

Then I chopped the garlic (I like my garlic chunky, so I didn't cut too tiny) and I added it to the hot pan with some red pepper flakes (add as much as you can handle):

My garlic looks weird and translucent because it was in the freezer.  My parents buy a giant bag from Costco and freeze it, making it translucent.  It doesn't change the texture or taste though; once cooked, you can't tell the difference.  I promise!  See:

Then I chopped the chicken tenders in small pieces and added them to the pan with a pinch of salt and pepper.

Once it was cooked, I used a slotted spoon to remove the chicken and garlic from the pan and onto a plate:

Look at our lovely pan!

It would look even more delicious if this pan wasn't non-stick.  My bad!  You really want all those yummy brown bits stuck to the bottom.  Now we add 1/4 cup chicken stock (or white wine would be super yummy!) 

and I juiced one large lemon:

Turn the heat up a little, scrape the bottom of the pan to mix those yummy bits into the sauce and let it simmer a few minutes:

Then we add our star, the squash noodles:

This is the worst picture in existence...I deeply apologize.  Let the noodles cook in the sauce for a few minutes, stirring occasionally.  At this point I add a little more salt and pepper.  The squash will cook down quite a bit.  

Nope, THIS is the worst picture in existence.  Then we invite the chicken/garlic back to the party:

It's basically done at this point.  The sauce will be thin, but that's okay, as it adds tons of flavor!  The noodles should be cooked, but not soggy.  Try to keep a little bite to them.  Now for the moment of truth!

Test #1 - Looks:  It sure does look like noodles.

Test #2 - Taste:  While it didn't exactly taste like noodles, I have to admit, it was DELICIOUS!  The squash was cooked perfectly and the garlic with the lemon was amazing!  This could definitely make a full meal, but you can add more stuff if you want.  Shrimp would blow my mind, as well as some cheese or more yummy veggies.  

Test #3 - Fullness: After I eat a bowl of pasta, I usually lie on the floor writhing in pain until I pass out from a food coma.  This fake pasta, on the other hand, was so light my stomach didn't even realize I ate anything.  If it wasn't for my brain, I would have just kept on eating and eating until my fork hit counter.  

Make this now, not because you're in the mood for pasta (because this won't do it), but because you're in the mood for a light, delicious, mouth party.

Join me next time, when I eat the entire menu of the Olive Garden and have to be immediately airlifted to the hospital.  

Foreign Transaction Fees

*DISCLAIMER*  Disregard this post, unless you have a specific interest in how to spend your money while travelling.  It's really quite bland...sorry my head hurts too much to make it interesting.

I've been doing a lot of research on foreign transaction fees, exchange rates and commission fees and while it's not necessarily super interesting, it's important if you're planning to travel ANYWHERE outside the U.S.  So, I figured I'd share the wealth of my vast knowledge (I bookmarked an article from NBC News, so I think I'm pretty much an expert now).  Here goes nothing!

Foreign transaction fees - When travelling to another country (yes, even Canada and Mexico), every time you use your debit or credit card you are charged a fee from your credit card company/bank because it's soooooo much trouble for them to convert your money for you.  The only credit card I know of that doesn't charge a FTF is Capital One (which we have, yay!).  The best banks (for ATM withdrawals) are Bank of America and CitiBank (which we have too, SCORE!).  Be very careful because even though 2-3% doesn't seem like a lot, it adds up!  If you spend $1000 with a 3% fee, you're paying $30 in FTF!  It may not seem like much, but could be dinner or a nice scarf.

Commission fees - some companies charge a commission fee for exchanging your money for you (is no where safe??).  There are some companies that do not charge a commission fee in order to attract more people, BUT (there's always a BUT) be careful because when they don't charge a commission, they usually have higher exchange rates (meaning you're getting less currency for your dollars).  Confused yet?
In the long run, just remember if you're exchanging a small amount of money, go for the no commission because they take the commission first.  Here's an example: You want to exchange $10 into Euro (you're a straight dumbo, but whatev).  Ass hat A charges no commission fee, but has a higher exchange rate, so you will get about 7 Euro instead of about 8.50 (what you would get with a good exchange rate).  Ass hat B has a great exchange rate, but charges a $5 commission fee, so they will take out the $5 THEN convert the remaining $5 to Euros, leaving you with only about 4.  Therefore, your best bet is to go with no commission fee (Ass hat A).  If you are exchanging a lot of money (say, $1000), then you want to do the opposite because who cares about $5 in the grand scheme of things, you want the better exchange rate in that case (Ass hat B).  Man, this is making no sense whatsoever, is it?

Dynamic Currency Conversion (DCC) - To be avoided at all costs, DCC is a "service" lots of stores, restaurants and ATMs will provide in which they have the cost of a transaction converted from local currency to dollars to make it easier for you (stupid Americans).  This "favor" will cost you because they charge a fee each time, sort of like a foreign transaction fee.  Just say no when they ask if you would like your transaction converted into dollars.

Bottom line, nothing is free people!  But, there are ways to make your life a little less expensive if you follow these rules:
Wait until you're abroad to exchange your money and NEVER do it at the airport.  One article compared it to buying a Snickers from a minibar.
Find an ATM, wait in line and use your 0% transaction fee debit card (and don't let them DCC you!).  Take out a good amount of money and hide it in your money belt until you get to your hotel (and then hide it in the safe).  Take out extra money for emergencies.
Use a credit card with a 0% foreign transaction fee.  If you don't have one, use cash for larger purchases.

Sorry, this was so lame.  Believe it or not, this is the Cliffs notes version.  I just figured I did hours of super boring research, so no one else should have to suffer my same fate.  Why yes, I have been compared to Mother Teresa, why do you ask?

Here's an adorable dog picture to settle your brain:

They kinda look dead, don't they?  Still cute...I know, I'm morbid.

Squirrel pants

Aaron was beyond excited to come home, not only to see his beloved (that's me!) and his babies, but also to quit working and go on a year-long vaca!  What could be better than that??  I'll tell you what......squirrel pants.  Yup, you heard me correctly.  Aaron ordered these dumb-ass, idiotic, stupid, mother f***ing squirrel sweat pants and he was more excited to see them than any of us.  He was practically shoving me out of the way and nose-diving to get to the pants:

Two things worth noting:

1.  This is the most ridiculously stupid article of clothing in existence.  The people that invented these should be shot on sight.

2.  This "effortless" picture actually took A LOT of effort.  Aaron is like a girl when it comes to taking pictures.  It was like an actual photo shoot (except not because I can barely take a picture without my finger accidentally making an appearance).  

Overall, these pants could only be dumber if they were those tearaway kind that breakdancers wear.  Not only would he trade our first-born child for these pants, but he actually tried to wear them in public on our date night!  It's obscene!  There are children out there!  This is what I'm dealing with, people!  It'll be a miracle if we make it through this year alive.  Sigh...

The ball is rolling!

Since Aaron is finally home, we're starting to get this show on the road!  There were so many things I was unable to do without a date, that now I'm juggling a million balls at once (hehehe...yes, I'm a child).  Wanna check out all the cool stuff I'm doing?  Did I mention NONE of it is fun stuff?  Oh well, too late, you already agreed!

First thing I did was text Travel Agent Deb and let her know ALL SYSTEMS GO!  She's working on booking our Around The World Tickets as we speak!  How baller is it that we're getting Around The World plane tickets??  Awesome sauce!  Yup, I just ruined it by saying awesome sauce.  I guess I'll never be cool.
I'm trying really hard not to think about the fact that when we get home we'll probably be broke.  Oh well, you only live once and I'll never be able to say that I haven't lived.  Speaking of living, check out my fun-filled day!

I woke up and found a travel clinic where I can get my remaining vaccinations.  Whoa!  There's no slowing me down!  What can I say, I'm pretty wild.

Of course, I put it off until the last minute because needles terrify me, but also because there are some vaccinations you have wait to get until 2 weeks before departure.  Of course, I now no longer have health insurance (for some stupid reason jobs don't want to provide health insurance to employees that quit.  Who shoved a stick up their butts?), so I'm going to have to pay out of pocket, which will be delightful.  Of course, I'm an idiot.  Of course, of course, of course!
*In all seriousness, I need to give a shout-out to my work for letting me keep my health insurance (at the employee rate) for the entire month of January, even though my last day was the 2nd.  They totally didn't have to and it was super nice of them!  Stay classy, CSS!*

Next, I got visas for the countries that require them (so far: Argentina and Australia).  Argentina's is called a reciprocity fee and every US citizen visiting Argentina has to pay.  Basically America charges Argentinians a fee to enter our country, so Argentina's like a 10-year old girl, sticking their tongue out at us, saying "Oh yea?  Two can play that game!"  So now we have to pay $160 to enter their country (it better be worth it).  I had to fill out a form online and pay the fee and now we can enter as many times as we want for the next 10 years.

Super confusing and straight up dumb-ass website (didn't help it was in Spanish and I had to Google translate it).  They need to get Mark Zuckerberg down there STAT because that shit was ridiculous!  I felt like Zoolander trying to figure out how to use a computer for the first time (he tried to break it open to get the "files" out...man, I love that movie!).

Then Australia's, which is called an ETA Visa, and is only like $35 per person, but it's only good for 1 year.  

This website took 1/50th the amount of time as the other one.  I can already tell we're gonna have a hard time in a foreign country.  I rely so much on being able to read, I'm going to go crazy when I can't.  Why are there even other languages besides English?  Is it really necessary??  Ok, I'm totally joking, but that's probably a perfect example of why everyone hates us.  Stupid Americans.

Then I worked on our health insurance plan.  

YAY!  It's a straight up party over here!  I re-read the "brochure" just for shits and giggles.  I don't know how they can possibly think they're fooling people into thinking it's a brochure.  It's 25 pages and there are barely any pictures, which is the exact opposite of every brochure I've ever seen in my life.  OMG kill me now!

Did I mention that Aaron's currently playing beer pong with his friends, as I painstakingly read this refrigerator manual??  I better get something really good for Valentine's Day (and by good for me, I mean humiliating for him).  Just so all you guys are aware, that's what we really want: for you to make a complete fool of yourself in the name of love.  That, and diamonds, duh!  Don't be cheap!

Lucky for us, I'm super, hyper organized, so I scanned all of our documents, passports, credit cards and health records and put them into my Dropbox (as well as printed paper copies).  That's me, practical and prepared!  You're so turned on right now!  

If you're ever travelling, do yourself a favor and make copies of all your stuff (paper and digital).  That way if (when) you lose it, you have copies (or just carry the copy if you're going out for the day and don't want to risk losing the real thing).  Also, make sure someone back at home has all the copies as well and knows where you are, just in case.  It's really about travelling smart because there's a good chance you'll lose stuff (get robbed) along the way and you don't want one small loss to ruin your entire trip.  

Geez, these pictures of computer screens are majorly lame, so I'll end with an action shot!

Aww, they're so in love!  NOT!  They were totally chewing on each other's faces, WHILE Kane had his Kong in his mouth (his mouth is seriously endless, I bet if you sent a search team up there you'd find Elian Gonzalez in a closet, another woman Bill Cosby roofied and probably one of those old rotary phones...that mouth is large, that's all I'm saying).

Well guys, that's all I have time to write for today.  Just wait til tomorrow, when I describe (in great detail) turning my 403b into a Rollover IRA.  Ohhh, you're on the edge of your seat!  Nighty night!

Surprise!

So, it's almost 2am, and I wake up to dogs barking and the front door opening.  I immediately know it's my brother because no one else would come over so late.  I had just gone to bed about 20 minutes earlier, so I'm automatically annoyed.  Then I hear him coming up the stairs and sit up to see Aaron standing there!!  He came home and surprised me!!!  I couldn't believe it!  FINALLY!  My brother and his girlfriend were videotaping, hoping for some Oprah-worthy reunion, but I was so shocked all I could do was hug him and say, "Are you really home?"
He is really home.  I have to keep saying it and pinching myself to make sure it's real.  I had constant proof because he snored ALL night.  I took a voice memo, so you could hear it too (of course, I couldn't get it to load, so you'll just have to imagine it).  It was so loud (which usually happens when he's really tired), but I didn't mind, it was like (loud) music to my ears!  If you ever have to be away from your significant other for any extended period, you have my sympathies, as it is not easy.  It's a huge adjustment when they leave, and believe it or not, it's just as huge an adjustment when they return, as you've settled into a new routine.  Either way, I'm just happy he's finally home and my heart is finally at peace.
He's home.

He's home!

OMG!