Summer Squash Pasta

Wassup folks?!  Today, we are making pasta, but instead of noodles we are using squash!

The recipe called for zucchini, but all I had was squash and I didn't feel like driving (It's a miracle I even got out of bed this morning).  Now, I typically don't like making recipes that aren't easy and accessible to all, but I had to make an exception with this one because I really wanted to try it.
Let's do this shiz!
This is the contraption I used:

It's my mom's curly fry maker from Sur la Table.  It's pretty awesome at making curly fries, so I figured why not curly squash noodles?  If you don't happen to have one of these strange contraptions, you can also use a mandoline or a spiralizer (no idea what that is).  If you have none of these (in other words, you probably have a life), then I guess you can try cutting the zucchini/squash really thin?  Or just watch me do it.
So I washed 2 squash (the plural of squash is squash, right?) and cut the ends off and stuck one end on the spikes of the curly fry maker:

Then I stuck the other end into this hole:

Then you turn this lever:

Watch the magic happen:

In the end, you're left with this weird squash mushroom:

After 2 squash, this is how many "noodles" I had:

It looks like a lot, but they're relatively thin and will cook down quite a bit.

Here are our ingredients:

We've got a crap-ton of garlic, red pepper flakes, chicken broth (if you have white wine, even better!), a lemon and 5-6 chicken breast tenders.

I took a large pan and added some olive oil (a tablespoon or so) and turned the heat to medium-low:

Then I chopped the garlic (I like my garlic chunky, so I didn't cut too tiny) and I added it to the hot pan with some red pepper flakes (add as much as you can handle):

My garlic looks weird and translucent because it was in the freezer.  My parents buy a giant bag from Costco and freeze it, making it translucent.  It doesn't change the texture or taste though; once cooked, you can't tell the difference.  I promise!  See:

Then I chopped the chicken tenders in small pieces and added them to the pan with a pinch of salt and pepper.

Once it was cooked, I used a slotted spoon to remove the chicken and garlic from the pan and onto a plate:

Look at our lovely pan!

It would look even more delicious if this pan wasn't non-stick.  My bad!  You really want all those yummy brown bits stuck to the bottom.  Now we add 1/4 cup chicken stock (or white wine would be super yummy!) 

and I juiced one large lemon:

Turn the heat up a little, scrape the bottom of the pan to mix those yummy bits into the sauce and let it simmer a few minutes:

Then we add our star, the squash noodles:

This is the worst picture in existence...I deeply apologize.  Let the noodles cook in the sauce for a few minutes, stirring occasionally.  At this point I add a little more salt and pepper.  The squash will cook down quite a bit.  

Nope, THIS is the worst picture in existence.  Then we invite the chicken/garlic back to the party:

It's basically done at this point.  The sauce will be thin, but that's okay, as it adds tons of flavor!  The noodles should be cooked, but not soggy.  Try to keep a little bite to them.  Now for the moment of truth!

Test #1 - Looks:  It sure does look like noodles.

Test #2 - Taste:  While it didn't exactly taste like noodles, I have to admit, it was DELICIOUS!  The squash was cooked perfectly and the garlic with the lemon was amazing!  This could definitely make a full meal, but you can add more stuff if you want.  Shrimp would blow my mind, as well as some cheese or more yummy veggies.  

Test #3 - Fullness: After I eat a bowl of pasta, I usually lie on the floor writhing in pain until I pass out from a food coma.  This fake pasta, on the other hand, was so light my stomach didn't even realize I ate anything.  If it wasn't for my brain, I would have just kept on eating and eating until my fork hit counter.  

Make this now, not because you're in the mood for pasta (because this won't do it), but because you're in the mood for a light, delicious, mouth party.

Join me next time, when I eat the entire menu of the Olive Garden and have to be immediately airlifted to the hospital.